Who ya gonna call? Gho- I mean, the funeral director.

by littlemissfuneral

I like to sing when I’m working. Not seriously, because if you ever heard me seriously sing you’d most likely hit me over the head with the nearest blunt object you could get your hands on to knock me out. Because that’s how much I can’t sing. But alas, I still try. I don’t know why. Maybe because I know no one is really going to judge me. Besides Mark. He judges me. But you would too, so you can’t hold it against him. Mostly he just lets me embarrass myself without really saying anything.

One day a couple of weeks ago, I was doing it again. I was singing something stupid in the office while we worked. I forget what I was singing exactly, but it must have been something I made up related to the funeral home. It was enough after all to make Mark stop what he was doing, pull me over to his computer and watch this:

Fast forward to 11:45 and watch until 15:00.


Well, needless to say I was ecstatic. How could you not enjoy good wholesome TV like that? It also clicked something in my head. So now is the time when I put away the fact that I can’t sing, and get down to the business that is my blog.

So virtual blogging world, I ask you this question: Is it really out of the question for funeral homes to advertise?

One day, when I first started to work for the funeral home I’m employed at now I went out to lunch with my boss. His name is Charles, and I’ve just noticed that I’ve never formally introduced you guys. He is the best boss that I’ve ever had. And I’m not sucking up. But I am moving on. While we were eating lunch at a diner that’s about two streets away from the funeral home he pointed to something outside the window. It was a billboard. He told me he was thinking about putting an advertisement up there. I thought it was a good idea.

Now I know funeral homes do advertise to an extent. I mean, if you go to any Catholic Church all you have to do is pick up a bulletin and turn it to the last page. On it you’ll find about five different funeral homes. I guess that’s a good idea. A lot of old people go to Church. And they read the bulletin. Maybe they’ll find a nice funeral home. But what about all the people who don’t go to Church? Is it really out of the question for a funeral home to advertise on the radio? Or even on television? I forgot who it was, but a local funeral home in Buffalo did do just that. I remember watching TV, seeing it come on and getting super excited. The only problem was I only saw it once. I see that stupid lottery commercial twenty-seven times a day. You know, the one that goes “I can’t believe this bikini still fits me!” But when a valuable service that people will need puts a commercial on TV I only see it once. But I don’t know the details. Maybe it was too expensive to run. Or maybe it got negative comments so the funeral firm decided to take it down. I really hope it’s the first one, though.

It just seems to me like so many people are afraid to talk about death. And I know why. I’ve said it before. Death is unknown. No one knows what happens after you die and that’s scary. It’s really scary. And advertising about the death care industry could be controversial. Just think of what your reaction would be. Maybe shock? Maybe disgust? I know some parents might be upset. Because young kids have access to the media and death can just be oh so negative. We don’t want poor little Johnny to hear about death! It is a taboo subject matter! And so sad! But in a world where there is so much sex, drugs and violence easily accessible to kids, does a funeral home advertisement seem that horrible? If you knew of a place with caring people, with “a plot and a plan” and with the correct tools to help you with grief journey after you lost a loved one, wouldn’t you want to know? I don’t think it sounds that bad when put that way. I think it actually sounds a lot better than Grand Theft Auto, but what do I know? I do know this: the day I turn on the radio, and hear a real advertisement for a funeral home, I’m going to dance around like Mr. Ferryman, and I’m going to be happy. Because after all, a funeral home is a business. It’s a great business too, because it’s filled with event planners, doctors for the dead, make up artists and public speakers. Oh, and by the way, in many cases all those people are rolled into one person, your friendly neighborhood funeral director. And for the great service we provide in a time when you need it the most, well, I think everyone should know about it. Maybe Mr. Ferryman didn’t have the correct wording down. Maybe telling his possible customers that “one day they’re going to bite it” wasn’t the  most sensitive of ways. But he is right. One day, you will need us. And I think it’s about time funeral directors take the time to inform families of the services they offer. It’s kind of so simple that it’s stupid. It’s just up to the funeral director to be brave, and the community to be accepting.